Post by hodor on Aug 7, 2016 19:15:19 GMT 8
With the addition of 1k bets with increased return rates in poker, I figured people might appreciate a proper guide so as to minimise their time spent in the casino. Fair warning: following this method will probably make you hate the casino and yourself, but will provide the fastest returns.
The maths:
The returns from the Joker Poker game itself are terrible. In Australia, pokie machines have a minimum Return To Player (RTP) rate of 85%. That is, for every dollar you put in the machine it must return at least 85 cents. Most machines will have an RTP between 96-99% (so you don't feel like you're losing). Granblue poker has an RTP rate of 74% (even worse in the lower bet variants).
However, Granblue poker is wildly profitable thanks to the 2 Card Higher-or-Lower (H/L) mini-game they let us play after winning a hand of poker. I won't go into detail on the maths for the game itself, the only thing that's important to know is that every round of H/L you play correctly has a ridiculous RTP rate of roughly 151%. This makes the optimal strategy very obvious: play as many rounds of H/L as possible.
But this knowledge comes at a cost. Since the primary goal is to play as many rounds of H/L as possible, the only way to escape the H/L minigame is to either hit the round cap, the payout cap, or lose. To play optimally you are going to have to lose. A lot. For every round of poker, the odds of having a winning hand and just making it to H/L is only 30%. Then, if played correctly, you have roughly 70% odds of winning each round of H/L. When you multiply that out by 10 rounds and combine it with the poker odds, the chance of you "winning" is about 0.7%, or 1 in every 140 hands. This is the price we must pay.
The rewards:
Exponential numbers are great, they get very big very fast (to add a further multiplier to the exponent would be ridiculous *cough*1cardbug*cough*). If you are playing H/L out till it caps you, when you do eventually win the payout will usually be 1-2.5 million chips. I'm unable to calculate the exact return on each hand because brute forcing it would take my computer all of eternity and I can't figure out the correct statistical equation to solve it, but my conservative estimate (based on approximate calculations) is that every hand of poker you play optimally has a 1200% return. That is, for every round of 1k poker you play, you get 12k chips back. You can and should think of this as you play, for only then can you truly attain Grindblue ZEN, wherein-which you realise that there is no poker, there is no higher-or-lower, there are no cards. You are simply playing a shitty version of CookieClicker, and the faster you click the faster you get to Christina's fine ass.
With that in mind, if you're quick you should be playing 5-6 hands per minute, and can expect returns of 3-5 million chips per hour. That's Christina in ~24hrs. If you want to buy every consumable in the cage on a monthly basis except the red bricks and stone, it's 21.6 million per month. You should be able to hit that just playing 2hrs each week.
How to play correctly:
I'm assuming you've played a bit of poker before and know what the winning hands look like. If you haven't, head to wikipedia.
Poker:
You should keep the following combinations on the flop, in this order:
Higher-or-Lower:
2-7, press High. 9-A, press Low. Every time, no matter what the cap is. Do it.
8's are the special case. In the first round, the return on an 8 is 50/50. You should definitely play it, because your goal is to play as many rounds of H/L as possible. 50% odds is better than 30% that you get from another hand of poker. After the first round, the correct choice for an 8 fluctuates slightly depending on the cards that have come up in previous rounds. If the first card was a two, and the second was an 8, in the second round you should choose High because there are 24 remaining cards that are higher, and only 23 lower.
A masterful player would remember the cards played in each round and always choose accordingly. I do not recommend you attempt to do this, instead just pick High or Low right now, and stick with that choice for every 8 forevermore. It is impossible for the odds of this method to fall below 30%, so (while not optimal), it is always a better choice than walking away. For those of you who have not yet attained ZEN, you may choose to stop playing on an 8 if the pool is already large, so as to ease the pain of constant loss. The reduction in winnings is small and I won't hold it against you.
Getting started:
As discussed, this method involves a lot of losing, which means you need to have a safe amount of buffer before your start. If it's your first time in the casino, I'd recommend you take the money on 6/7/8/9/10 in H/L, and play 100 bet poker until you've got to at least 50k chips, then switch to 1k bets and keep taking the money in H/L until you get to 200k+. In 2 Card H/L, the card that flips on the right will always be the care on the left in the next round, that's how you know whether to play again or not.
That's it folks. If you think there's problems with my math or have a solution for the exact ROI I'd appreciate you letting me know.
TL;DR: Always keep playing Hi-Low up until you either lose or hit a cap. Press High for 2-8, Low for 9-A.
The maths:
The returns from the Joker Poker game itself are terrible. In Australia, pokie machines have a minimum Return To Player (RTP) rate of 85%. That is, for every dollar you put in the machine it must return at least 85 cents. Most machines will have an RTP between 96-99% (so you don't feel like you're losing). Granblue poker has an RTP rate of 74% (even worse in the lower bet variants).
However, Granblue poker is wildly profitable thanks to the 2 Card Higher-or-Lower (H/L) mini-game they let us play after winning a hand of poker. I won't go into detail on the maths for the game itself, the only thing that's important to know is that every round of H/L you play correctly has a ridiculous RTP rate of roughly 151%. This makes the optimal strategy very obvious: play as many rounds of H/L as possible.
But this knowledge comes at a cost. Since the primary goal is to play as many rounds of H/L as possible, the only way to escape the H/L minigame is to either hit the round cap, the payout cap, or lose. To play optimally you are going to have to lose. A lot. For every round of poker, the odds of having a winning hand and just making it to H/L is only 30%. Then, if played correctly, you have roughly 70% odds of winning each round of H/L. When you multiply that out by 10 rounds and combine it with the poker odds, the chance of you "winning" is about 0.7%, or 1 in every 140 hands. This is the price we must pay.
The rewards:
Exponential numbers are great, they get very big very fast (to add a further multiplier to the exponent would be ridiculous *cough*1cardbug*cough*). If you are playing H/L out till it caps you, when you do eventually win the payout will usually be 1-2.5 million chips. I'm unable to calculate the exact return on each hand because brute forcing it would take my computer all of eternity and I can't figure out the correct statistical equation to solve it, but my conservative estimate (based on approximate calculations) is that every hand of poker you play optimally has a 1200% return. That is, for every round of 1k poker you play, you get 12k chips back. You can and should think of this as you play, for only then can you truly attain Grindblue ZEN, wherein-which you realise that there is no poker, there is no higher-or-lower, there are no cards. You are simply playing a shitty version of CookieClicker, and the faster you click the faster you get to Christina's fine ass.
With that in mind, if you're quick you should be playing 5-6 hands per minute, and can expect returns of 3-5 million chips per hour. That's Christina in ~24hrs. If you want to buy every consumable in the cage on a monthly basis except the red bricks and stone, it's 21.6 million per month. You should be able to hit that just playing 2hrs each week.
How to play correctly:
I'm assuming you've played a bit of poker before and know what the winning hands look like. If you haven't, head to wikipedia.
Poker:
You should keep the following combinations on the flop, in this order:
- Any instantly winning hand
- 4 to a flush
- A pair
- Four to an outside straight
- Joker only
Higher-or-Lower:
2-7, press High. 9-A, press Low. Every time, no matter what the cap is. Do it.
8's are the special case. In the first round, the return on an 8 is 50/50. You should definitely play it, because your goal is to play as many rounds of H/L as possible. 50% odds is better than 30% that you get from another hand of poker. After the first round, the correct choice for an 8 fluctuates slightly depending on the cards that have come up in previous rounds. If the first card was a two, and the second was an 8, in the second round you should choose High because there are 24 remaining cards that are higher, and only 23 lower.
A masterful player would remember the cards played in each round and always choose accordingly. I do not recommend you attempt to do this, instead just pick High or Low right now, and stick with that choice for every 8 forevermore. It is impossible for the odds of this method to fall below 30%, so (while not optimal), it is always a better choice than walking away. For those of you who have not yet attained ZEN, you may choose to stop playing on an 8 if the pool is already large, so as to ease the pain of constant loss. The reduction in winnings is small and I won't hold it against you.
Getting started:
As discussed, this method involves a lot of losing, which means you need to have a safe amount of buffer before your start. If it's your first time in the casino, I'd recommend you take the money on 6/7/8/9/10 in H/L, and play 100 bet poker until you've got to at least 50k chips, then switch to 1k bets and keep taking the money in H/L until you get to 200k+. In 2 Card H/L, the card that flips on the right will always be the care on the left in the next round, that's how you know whether to play again or not.
That's it folks. If you think there's problems with my math or have a solution for the exact ROI I'd appreciate you letting me know.
TL;DR: Always keep playing Hi-Low up until you either lose or hit a cap. Press High for 2-8, Low for 9-A.